This week, the Six-Kilo-Cat developed her annual fussy-with-furballs problem, necessitating the administration of twice daily tablets, Cat-Lax paste and a whole new menu.
Scratched-up and emotionally crippled by the ordeal, I took myself to the shops in search of new cat chow – something to hide tablets in, chiefly. To this point, I’d managed to stay within the Kia-to-Corolla range of cat food, but desperation finally brought me to the Rolls Royce of kitty cuisine.
Comedians in cat food labelling...
Well, how funny did I feel, reading the labels:
* pate, marinade, jus, sauce and gravy (nary a jelly at this price point)
* sliced, shredded, whole, or strips
* chicken, turkey, duck, whitemeat, ocean fish (how discriminatory), prawns, beef, chicken hearts and livers, virgin tuna (as opposed to what, exactly?)
* accented with long grain rice, tossed with vegetables
* a delight, affair or banquet?
Readers would know that truth in advertising is something I hold dear, mainly because it happens so rarely. Give me a brand of cat food, something like this:
* Ducks’ guts in goop
* Fish eyes ‘n fins jelly
* Chicken wobblies in sauce
* Beef offal with cereal.
As the kids insightfully point out, the cat can’t read. However, after all the fuss and big-spending on new food, the kids also advise me that the boss only eats what comes out of light pink tins and still spits out the tablets. Go figure.
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Comedy in cat food labelling
This week, the Six-Kilo-Cat developed her annual fussy-with-furballs problem, necessitating the administration of twice daily tablets, Cat-Lax paste and a whole new menu.
Scratched-up and emotionally crippled by the ordeal, I took myself to the shops in search of new cat chow – something to hide tablets in, chiefly. To this point, I’d managed to stay within the Kia-to-Corolla range of cat food, but desperation finally brought me to the Rolls Royce of kitty cuisine.
Comedians in cat food labelling...
Well, how funny did I feel, reading the labels:
* pate, marinade, jus, sauce and gravy (nary a jelly at this price point)
* sliced, shredded, whole, or strips
* chicken, turkey, duck, whitemeat, ocean fish (how discriminatory), prawns, beef, chicken hearts and livers, virgin tuna (as opposed to what, exactly?)
* accented with long grain rice, tossed with vegetables
* a delight, affair or banquet?
Readers would know that truth in advertising is something I hold dear, mainly because it happens so rarely. Give me a brand of cat food, something like this:
* Ducks’ guts in goop
* Fish eyes ‘n fins jelly
* Chicken wobblies in sauce
* Beef offal with cereal.
As the kids insightfully point out, the cat can’t read. However, after all the fuss and big-spending on new food, the kids also advise me that the boss only eats what comes out of light pink tins and still spits out the tablets. Go figure.
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